iFall into Middle Earth
by Distant Lands
Summary: Sam, Carly, and Freddie watch the Two Towers and end up sleeping at Carly's. When they wake up, what will they find? Seddie and maybe some romance with LOTR characters. No slash. HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I know, surprised that I'm actually writing something after I said I wouldn't, right? Well, I realized that one of the things we had to do in my busy busy schedule was go to the library, so here I come to you, from my library computer, with an all new story. I will work on "iWish I Hadn't Said That," but a great new idea popped into my head last night. So, without further ado, I give you "iFall into Middle Earth"!**

_Sam POV_

I quickly ran into Blocksmasher, hoping to get the new Green-Ray version of the Two Towers before it got checked out. Carly had gotten a Green-Ray player with her new room after Spencer burned her original one up, and I wanted to watch the movie that scared the crap out of Freddie- I mean FredDORK! Anyway, pretend I never said that. I saw it, and some ugly fat person (**I'm not meaning to offend heavy/overweight people, remember, this is Sam's POV, not mine**) about to grab it. "NOOOOOOO!" I shouted, the person thought I was insane, and ran. Yay, I'm able to get it first!

Carly was home, drinking a Peppy Cola and watching "Girly Cow" on their TV downstairs.

"Hey Carls, is it okay if I go watch this new movie on your Green-Ray player upstairs?"

"Sure Sam, as long as it's not 'Psycho'. That movie freaks me out. I wasn't able to take a shower without Spencer standing guard outside the bathroom door for six months!"

"No, it's not. It's 'Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers'!"

"Really? I love that movie!"

"Yeah, it just came out today and I got it from Blocksmasher."

"You didn't scare away a fat person this time, did you?" Carly asked. The reason she asks this is because I did the same exact thing when Fellowship of the Ring came out last month.

"No…" I said, putting on my lying face.

"Sam!"

"Sorry, but I wanted it!"

"It's okay Sam. Go upstairs while I pop some popcorn."

"YAY!"

I ran up the stairs as Carly went to go ask Spencer where the popcorn was.

I had forgotten how Carly gets when watching Lord of the Rings. She always screams psycho-fangirl screams when Legolas appears on-screen and then I can't hear what the crap is going on. Then, guess who comes through the door other then the dorky, ugly, almost fat… Frednub.

"Whatcha watching?" he asked.

"First of all, don't _ever_ try to sound cool again. It's not good for keeping Momma's ears in good health," I replied, "Second, we're watching the movie that gives poor wittle Fweddie nightmares."

"YOU'RE WATCHING 'JAWS'!"

"No, we are watching the Two Towers."

"AHHHHHHHHH!"

We ended up crashing at Carly's. Freddie slept on the couch and I slept in Carly's room with her. Little did we know, we would be in for a big surprise.


	2. Chapter 2

**Finally you get the next chapter!**

_Sam POV_

Dirt... why do I smell dirt? Grass as well. I awoke to find Frednub and Carls lying next to me. 'Great, just great,' I thought, 'I'm stuck here in the middle of a field with a dork and my best friend.'

Just then, Carly started groaning and sat up.

"SAM! Where are we?" she exclaimed.

"I have no crap of an idea? How 'bout we ask the nub," I suggested.

"Good idea. Freddie, wake up please," Carly said, while carefully shaking him awake.

"Not like that! Like this," I told her, and gave her my example. "WAKE UP FREDBAG!"

"AH! Sam, why did you scare me like that?" he said, acting all discombobulated.

"Because you wouldn't wake up, no chizz!" I half-yelled, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Where are we?" Carly asked Freddie kindly.

"I don't know."

"I think I do. There's Bree," I said simply.

"Sam, stop fooling around. This is serious," Carly said in a calm voice.

"I'm not kidding, I SWEAR!"

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not."

"Yes."

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NOOOOOOOOO-"

"WHERE THE HECK IS BREE?" Freddie exclaimed.

"Wow Benson. I didn't know you had it in you," I replied, my voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Bree is in Middle-Earth," said Carly answering his question.

"Yep. Maybe if we keep moving, we can run into Aragorn," I said.

"OR LEGOLAS!" screamed Carly in her infamous fangirl scream.

"I hope not," I said.

We started walking; not knowing of the long journey ahead of us.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Sorry if the chapters haven't been very long. I write these in homeroom, so I only have 15 minutes :P. This one I'm writing during a full length class, because I already finished my assignment in the first five minutes. So, enjoy :D!**

_Sam POV_

Leave it to Carly Shay to turn our trip to Middle-Earth into a totally Mary-Sue sap story. I was so ticked off at her, I didn't even feel good enough to tease Frednub.

"Carly, can you just shut up?" I practically screamed at her.

"But I'm so excited to meet Leggy!" Carly squealed back.

"LEGGY? WHAT KIND OF CRAP IS THIS?" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

"Leggy is not 'crap', Sam. He's my future husband."

"I thought I was going to be your future husband," said Fredweird, sounding disappointed.

"SHUT UP FREDBAG!" I screamed at his face.

"No need to get so sensitive, Princess Puckett," he spat, using the nickname that I lo- HATE!

"No need to get so sensitive, Princess Puckett," I said in a retard voice, mocking him.

"STOP IT!" shouted Carly, "We need to Bree."

"Now you say something, Carls. We're already there," I announced, as we entered through the West Bree gate.

"Aw... Legolas isn't here," Carly said with a face of disappointment.

"Yeah, but if we can get to the Prancing Pony, we can find Aragorn," I explained.

"Isn't Aragorn the evil guy?" Fredstupid asked.

"No, retard. Aragorn is the good guy. DUH!" I said.

"Well I'm sorry for asking a simple question," Freddie replied with sarcasm.

"Guys, the Prancing Pony is right up here!" Carly yelled excitedly.

"Awesome," I said.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Stupid teachers, saying we should research for our project rather than write fanfiction. Sorry for the super short chapter peeps, but thank you for all of the mcawesome reviews so far! They've really made my day!**

_Sam POV_

I can't believe that just unraveled in front of my very eyes. Seeing Frodo fall and disappear as the Ring slipped onto his finger; Aragorn grab him and drag him upstairs. 'Is it just me, or did that sound perverted?' I thought. Oh well, total perversion was going to take me over sooner or later. Now Fredcrap decided to ruin my train of thought.

"Sam?" he asked.

"What do you want, gay boy?" I snapped back.

"First of all, I'm not gay. Second of all, what just happened?"

"I'm not going to tell you. Ask your precious Car- Gibby!" I exclaimed, trying to continue my point about him being gay.

"_Gibby_? Really Sam, I never thought you'd stoop that low."

"Hey, you're too good looking to not be ga-" I was interrupted by some ugly fat person.

"Hello, and I'm Mr. Butterbur. Would you two lovebirds like a room?" he asked.

"LOVEBIRDS? Heck no; he is not my boyfriend!" I shouted in the guy's face.

"Well excuse me," he said, brushing off his bartending apron and walked away.

"Sam, what's going on?" said Carly, coming back from wherever people used to go to the bathroom in these days.

"Nothing…" I replied, leaving the sentence hanging in the air.

"Freddie, what did Sam do?" she asked, insisting that I did something wrong.

Freddie looked down at his shoes, like I had hurt his feelings really bad. "Sam called me gay."

"Sam!" Carly exclaimed, "I told you Freddie was very sensitive about his sexual identity."

"You did?" I said.

"Yes, I did. Now, try not to make a ruckus in here. People are listening."

"Fine," I replied with a huff as Carly walked over to Butterbutt to get us a room.

"Ha, got you!" Freddie exclaimed once Carly was out of earshot.

"Got me what?"

"I got you thinking that I was sensitive about my sexual identity."

"No, you didn't Fredweiner. I knew you weren't sensitive. I just pretended for Carls. Duh."

"Sam, did you ever realize how utterly inappropriate that nickname for me is?"

"Yep."

"Sam, you need to get your mind out of the gutter," he said, looking completely serious.

"But without the gutter my mind would be homeless!" I exclaimed, clutching my scalp in fake agony.

"Is Sam having a migraine?" Carly asked as she walked over.

"No, her mind's just homeless in the gutter," Fredbag replied.

"Ah…"

"Carly and I can share the bed. You're sleeping on the floor," I said, pushing Freddork onto the ground.

"Ouch Sam; my spleen!"

"I don't give a freakin' crap about your spleen, just get out of the freakin' bed," I whispered harshly trying to make sure the people in the next room wouldn't wake up.

"But Sam, I need to sle-" then he was cut off by the most horrible high-pitched screech I had ever heard.

"What the crap?"


	5. Author's Note

**AN: I'm so very sorry for not updating this in forever. I know I've been a right prat, but truth be told, I lost inspiration. Go ahead, tell me I've been a [insert swear word of choice here]. I just have not been as passionate about LOTR lately. **

**I do, however, have many plots for Harry Potter stories floating around in my brain. **

**Sorry again for not updating.**

**-Amy**


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